The 80s, oh the glorious 80s
This Halloween, I saw no shortage of kids and adults dressed like it was the 1980s, and combined with the Glee soundtrack of my childhood songs belted out in show choir glory, I daresay the 80s revival that I thought was short-lived is here to stay for a while. I give this just a few more years until the kids of the 90s start having buying power of their own, and then 90s will make a roaring comeback, fashions, merchandise, and all. In the meantime though I have my pick of 80s toys from which to choose for the holidays, but all the while I am thinking to myself, there’s not really any toy that I could choose for my kids from the current era that would stand the test of time. I mean…check out this gem. I have still an unopened, limited edition Cabbage Patch Kids twins circa 1985 in their burnt orange awesomeness. Zhu Zhu Pets, eat your cheap inner circuitry out.
Yes, I know. Halloween ended three days ago, and how dare I utter the word “holidays” already pre-turkey. This is not some brainwashing of the retail moguls. This is me not wanting to get caught at the last minute, scrambling for presents. I made a commitment last year to have all presents purchased, wrapped, and tucked away in my closet before Thanksgiving, and by golly, I’m going to do it.
As I was walking down some toy aisles, I saw Strawberry Shortcake, My Little Pony, Transformers (though no competing Go-Bots), Lite-Brite, Care Bears, and –I couldn’t believe it– even Moncchichis. I half expected Teddy Ruxpin to have his own plexiglass holiday showcase on an end-cap display, but instead I found a seriously irritating Mixmaster Mickey Mouse doll. Maybe if Mickey busta’ move to Ice Ice Baby, I might have bought it for grins, but alas that just shows my age. I figured with all this 80s revival in full swing, I should look for some Sweet Pickle books because smart moms know how kids’ minds grow upon Sweet Pickle. Much to my chagrin, my trusty smartphone search whilst in the store showed that those books went out of print a decade ago. I guess I can’t have everything back.
You know what I really want back? I want toys that don’t come equipped with electronic voice boxes. I want toys that don’t use batteries. I want the toys that if they are brought back from the 80s, don’t screw up the vintage faces with some strange morphed, botox version of what once was a glorious lead-laden, choking hazard toy. Ok, I’m kidding about the last part. At least don’t slap the same brand label on the product, because darn it… Smurfette should only ever have one transformation, the one where Papa Smurf made her a real Smurf with a real tail nub and not some wooden thing that Gargamel glued on to have Smurfette infiltrate the Smurf Village. Wow. I know way too much about the Smurfs which only goes to show, revive the 80s, but leave it as it was.
It was glorious, Dippity-do + Aqua Net hairdos and all. I leave you with this gem.
On with my shopping list…
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